Delayed Flight Gifts

Heavy snow on the east coast of America.

"We're airship people, not mega-airship people."

"He built his own airplane from a kit."

"If God had meant us to fly, he'd give us more leg room!"

"This bag is carry-on, and this one is kick-drop-throw-and-pile-on."

'...Excuse me...Whoops, my fault!..Sorry!..You first...Pardon Me...Sorry...S'cuse me...Look out!...Pardon'

Flight attendant piloting Santa's sleigh.

Birds Following Witch.

'I dont know about you, but I've got the feeling we're in for long flight delays...'

The First Kite

"I'll be a bit late... sorry."

"As a courtesy for the inconvenience, please accept a voucher for three additional hours of your life, redeemable upon your death."

This year, Barry resolved to try new things and take more chances - starting tomorrow.

Caveman who has just invented the wheel is amazed to see a paper airplane demonstrating the principle of flight.

"Is this your husbands first flight?"

"Well, that's just great! I guess pigs don't fly after all!"

'This may be the first day of the rest of my life, but I've decided to wait for the second day.'

'J.B. Potts, Head of Research, Aerodynamics...'

Exercise vs Laxative.

'Not only am I a frequent flyer, I'm a frequent waiter.'

Did you know that hawks can travel 250 miles without flapping? Big deal. So can I.

"Where aren't you going to?"

"It's a bicycle. My dad lost our Christmas club money in Atlantic City so I won't get the rest of it until my birthday."

Congressional Gym. I never need to go in there. I get plenty of exercise kicking the can down the road.

"Should've let go of the plane when I told you to."

Flight nap

"If I hear one more buzz I will pull this car over!"

Train Arrivals

"There's no way we can come to a decision - the meeting has only lasted half an hour."

EasyJet plane covered in pigeons.

It may work, but it's considered lazy and unprofessional.

'You'd never get me up in one of those things!'

Waiting and waiting and waiting room

Welcome To I'll-Start-Tomorrow-Cise!

'So...Now I can get American's loudy service and U.S. airways inept baggage handling all in one convenient airline?'