Degree Flaunter Gifts

"It appears Tom got his degree."

'Quite frankly Stephan, we're all sick of you shoving your cum laude in our faces.'

Postgraduates A group of posts on their way to class.

"I have a Bachelor's degree from Columbia, an MBA from Stanford, six years experience, and I'm a hell of a mouser."

"I see here that you are a recent graduate."

'You will now be presented with your degrees. That is, of course, after you jump through another one of our little hoops.'

'School of hard knocks.'

Graduate

Day one, post grad

'A bachelor's? Big deal - I have a MASTER'S degree in enlightenment!'

'I'm on the short degree course... hell of a lot to pack into one year!'

'I have an MBA, but I've never MBAed.'

"You’d think being anthropomorphic would be enough but nowadays you need a Masters to even get your foot in the door."

Bachelors and Masters degrees.

"First I'm getting a Bachelor's Degree, the a Master's Degree, then a Doctor's Degree!"

"And then after high school, I spent twelve years in college and majored in procrastination."

"I'm afraid your M.B.A. loses some of its lustre in light of the fact that you were home-schooled."

No room to hang his diploma.

'My son has college degrees in psychology, economics and political science. He can't get a job but at least he knows why.'

'...then I got my masters in psychology, and a year later I earned my Ph.D. in sociology. By the time I get my master in math and my doctorate in history, I'll be ready to retire.'

'Gee, maybe there was something wrong with this college.'

Academia Can Kill By Degrees

Medical Student

Graduate

' I see that you have a B.A. degree in stapling and collating. Your parents must be very proud of you.'

'If she's that upset about the football match we're playing in this afternoon, what's she going to be like when she hears about the darts match this evening?'

'I told you - they'll send me all these impressive looking diplomas when I pay off my student debt!'

"Terrific - degrees from the macaroni institute and the cheese academy."

'We sell gifts for people to give to graduates they know.'

'Come on! haven't you anything else to do?' 'There's always darts'

And if you go for your Masters', we'll throw in your PH.D. at no extra charge.

'I'm sorry - Mr. Jenkins, MBA, PhD, MD, Esq. is O.U.T.'

"I see you graduated Summa Cum Laude, but then didn't your whole graduating class."