Degree Dweller T-Shirts

'Gee, maybe there was something wrong with this college.'

'Noticeboard? I forgot it was there to be honest.'

"Tight......this isn't tight...now a New York City apartment......that's tight."

'I'll be late for dinner, dear. I'm up to my neck in paperwork.'

The Art Student.

'Sparky, fetch me an impudent little chardonnay.'

THE PIED PIPER OF GRAMERCY PARK

Ancient Landmarks of New York City

"The woman on the fire escape who acted like it was a balcony"

"Freudian, Jungian, Adlerian – none of it compares to retail therapy."

"No, ma'am. I'm not sure what the difference is between being creative or just plain weird."

No Parking - Scandal or No Scandal

Apart from protest footage I forget what downtown looks like.

"Oh, this old thing?"

'Will you please stop feeding the pigeons?!'

In case of emergency, break glass.

"Flat pack furniture is my passion. It's just a shame I haven't the space to assemble it."

Lift buttons read: East Side/West Side/All Around the Town.

"Excuse me ma'am, may I help you cross the road so that I can get the answer to this dumb joke my friend keeps telling?"

Kid arrives with CCTV camera, saying: 'It followed me home, can we keep it?'

''A desk job.' That's what they called it at the interview.' 'Same here.' 'SHH!'

Fleeting illusions of happiness hour 5-7

"The dangers of texting while walking #17"

Fish-tank Skyscraper.

"I thought we'd eat out on the patio for a change."

'I'm going to have to give up drinking and drugs when I leave uni - to pay off my bank loan.'

"I see here that you are a recent graduate."

"I can’t believe you’re doing this! I have abandonment issues! Abandonment issues!!!"

"I wish my Dad would get off my back! It's only been nine years and he wants to know if I've picked a major yet!"

'You will now be presented with your degrees. That is, of course, after you jump through another one of our little hoops.'

Upper West Side Story

How to cope in Los Angeles vs. New York

Day one, post grad

'Don't worry about the company's pension plan. The way we work you, you'll be lucky to live that long!'

"I travel Prada whenever I can."