Degree Detective Gifts

"Aha! A rare sighting of the employed graduate."

A boy acting suspiciously

'That large, rolled up newspaper is a reminder - mess up in this office and you'll pay the price.'

Welsh airport arrivals.

Man in office, desk covered in computer equipment, uses floor for photos, desk pads etc.

"It seemed like a long timeout."

'Don't you think it's time you did something about the draught in here?'

"Miss Jenkins, e-mail the housekeeper. Her telecommuting days are over"

"Robots can't take away your job, Khanna. No one knows what you do."

Jean, bring me everything we've got on gravity.

'Miscellaneous' and 'Non-Miscellaneous' trays

"Please, Ms. Sweeney, may I ask where you're going with all this?"

"First buttons, then zippers, now we learn to tie our shoes. Is mom trying to tell us something?"

'My school has a very strict detention policy.'

Good Cop, Bad Clown: 'Ok, ok I'll tell you what you want! Just make that creepy clown stop staring at me!'

"We need to talk about procrastination."

'Well, I guess a master's degree is a master's degree, even if it is in skateboarding.'

"The women on these dating sites don't seem to believe I'm a prince."

'Whoa! I can see a problem already. A misspelling on my diploma! Ha, ha . . . a little humor there.'

Kid to mom: 'How come I ask so many questions?'

'Please be quiet while the attempts to locate your head.'

The Sleep of Reason Produces Bureaucracy

"I noticed he had punched air holes in his desk. Now I'm afraid to open it."

'What do you mean give the boy a house key? He'll lose it, learn how to break in despite our sophisticated security system and be on his way to a life of crime.'

"Don't let the organized desk fool you. I have no idea where my computer files are."

"You should never ask her age unless it's carbon dating."

"You can use Dave's cubicle. He has Seasonal Affective Disorder and won't be using it this winter. Whoa! I guess I'm wrong. There he is, hibernating under the desk!"

"I'm from the Duvall Executive Search Agency, and I leave no stone unturned."

Jose Manuel Villarejo Scandal

"Then again, in some extreme cases, a swift kick in the pants is called for!"

"I realize Kyle was looking at your answers, but that doesn't mean you can sue him for theft of intellectual property."

"I think this is the last year he'll believe in Father Christmas, he's asking a lot of questions"

"Sorry, I'm John the Lutheran. The guy you want lives out in the wilderness."

"The charges of blackmail were dropped. Those pictures of the prosecutor really came in handy."

"I'm still in shock. He had such a trustworthy avatar."