Defense Mechanisms T-Shirts

Cowardly Sea Cactus

A bird that is also the helmet from a suit of armour (or is it a bird inside a helmet?). Notice the very small flying bird/helmet in the background.

Soldier trying to catch bomb with a cushion

dog vs UFO...

"You dropped yer wallet."

A military officer sits at his desk with desk trays marked 'Search' and 'Destroy.'

My therapist cured me of using humour as a defense...these days I pack a .45.

US fears missile competition.

'The attack will have to wait until tomorrow Congressman. Today is furlough day. . .'

'Iraq had no WMD's? Iran has no nukes? Surely there must be some terror-producing country to keep Americans frightened, and in support of big defense spending!'

"Tell Congress we need a super duper hypersonic missile."

Robo Sapiens

Boomerang

Of Congress can't come to an agreement on a spending plan...

"Hey Rudy, you've been in there for over an hour. You OK in there?" "I think I'm dying here." "What? D'you need me to call 911?" "I don't think that'll help." "I just need to build more pikemen and cavalry and buy a defense boost before the enemy's march reaches my city." "Get off your phone!!!" "I'm saving a kingdom here! It's important!"

U.S Airspace missile detection meets Santa

'Where was I on the night of the 7th of August? I was home washing my hair.'

"Has it occurred to you that you occasionally feign a lack of understanding?" "What the hell does that mean?"

'Teddy, someone from the Pentagon wants to talk to you about drones in Pakistan, whatever that means.'

Sir, they must have known we were going to storm the castle --- It was already weather-proofed!

'Okay - imagine you're a bailiff coming at me with a repossession order.'

Trump at NATO Summit

"Nice moat."

'These military teams really take their defence seriously...!'

Ronald Reagan

The House Always Wins

"There's and awful lot of anger there."

"Do the M.O.D allow many of their staff to work from home?"

"Brilliant... We'll take it"

"Sir, we are asking for $579 billion and 37 cents. How can you say our requests are too vague?"

'OK... But can he play defense?'

'Yes... the truth will set you free... but so will a damn good attorney.'

Satan 2

The mailing lists you're on says who you are

"Congratulations, General. The anti-missile system wasn't fooled by the decoy balloon."