Defense Industry Insider Pillows

The Unknown Military Contractor

"You do realize his ‘nose so bright’ is going to attract a horde of Defense Department drones."

That's What Happens

Defence Cutbacks.

"It's the kind of missile system that says, 'Hey, these peace negotiations aren't really going very well.'"

How the US Succeeded in Afghanistan

"I'm a common dolphin, I swim the west coast of Scotland foraging for fish and squid."

'What I call a miracle drug is one that doesn't start a government investigation.'

"Have you got any arguments why the world should trust in US policy?"

Supermarket Merge

Hello, you've reached the private line of the Secretary of Defense. At last! We tried calling you all day yesterday to alert you to an imminent threat. How did you get this number? It was coming straight at your nation-state at speeds approaching Kebin 2. What are you talking about? What's "Klebin 2"? Apologies. In earthlingese that would be "mach 23," or 24.140.16 kilometers per hour. Good lord! I'd better wake ... Not to worry. Our sensors locked on to it as soon as it launched from your North

US fears missile competition.

AUKUS Deal Annoys France

Oooops!

"Worst budget cuts ever!"

The Generals medals

'I believe the use of elastic- bands is down to the new government defence cut-backs!'

'M.O.D. find budget replacement for the Fleet Air arm.'

'Our ratings are down. Let's blame it on the media.'

'At last! Some decent kit.'

'Psst. It's okay in here, but don't go around calling $690 billion 'chump change.''

Mission accomplished.

'Iraq had no WMD's? Iran has no nukes? Surely there must be some terror-producing country to keep Americans frightened, and in support of big defense spending!'

Cyberwarfare

How To Cut The Defense Budget

"Today U.S. Defense Industry stocks rose on news Dick Cheney endorsed Donald Trump."

'The attack will have to wait until tomorrow Congressman. Today is furlough day. . .'

Defence Cuts: 'This is getting serious Sergeant, bring up the re-enforcements!'

"By George, that should do it - as long as we don[t bomb our own men again "

"My lawyer doesn't trust my agent who doesn't trust the director who doesn't trust the screenwriter who doesn't trust me. All perfectly normal."

The Thing That Won't Leave

Tank. Building this vehicle will create jobs and stimulate growth! He's given new meaning to the phrase "The economy's in the tank"!

F&E Submarine Contractors. When we ask the government for assistance, we should avoid calling it a "bailout."

The House Always Wins

Turkey Blocks Swedish and Finnish Nato Bids