Defense Devotee Gifts

"Now, suppose some guy comes at you balanced between two blocks."

Bomb Back Better

Dronin'

Lots of personal improvement classes are going on down there. The white blood cells are teaching a self-defense class. The neuron is instructing others about improving communication skills. And a proton and cornea cell have teamed up to teach a class on staying focused and positive! Is the helium atom participating in any of this? No, he thinks he's above it all!

Tearing down and building walls.

Support Our Apologists.

Bush breaking USA's piggy box for military expenses.

"I think we should stop talking about out target demographic."

'You can come down a peg. Mesopotamia gave the world bureaucracy, you know.'

The Jose Padilla Experience

"Beat it! Here comes the major and his entire staff!"

"And finally, I implore the jury not to take my clients lack of alibi and blatant lies out of context."

'Why do they call these conventions when everyone here is so unconventional?'

'Carry on sailor, just keep swimming around the coast and stick your head up now and again.'

Michael Caine

'Frank's last request was that he be cremated and that I never give up his season tickets.'

"It's General Douglas MacArthur."

Eye Off the Ball

"Ya know, dad...I get to pretend I'm a superhero because of real heroes like you."

"Here's the weak point."

Football Delivery

Army Man Playset 2020

'Iraq had no WMD's? Iran has no nukes? Surely there must be some terror-producing country to keep Americans frightened, and in support of big defense spending!'

"Today U.S. Defense Industry stocks rose on news Dick Cheney endorsed Donald Trump."

As years of unspoken tension surfaced, Trunky refused to raise his hand like a coward.

'I guess you're not from around here. In this region of the country football is in the religion section.'

Soldier watering camouflage plants on troops' helmets.

'Psst. It's okay in here, but don't go around calling $690 billion 'chump change.''

"Henry took a shower yesterday right next to Winthrop Rockefeller."

Banting in the Yeomanry

"No, I'm not able to transplant your computer's antivirus software into your body. Try washing your hands more often."

Remounts for the Yeomanry

"I can assure you, Your Honor, that my client knocked over the liquor store with the best of intentions."

"I wish I had known you have arachnophobia before I paid."

'Mess with me if you have to, son, but not with the regimental moustache!'