Decorum Disruptor Gifts

"Strawman argument terrorises conversation... News at eleven."

Horse statue throws off rider.

Support Group for high heels abandoned during the pandemic

"If he doesn't go nuts first, he'll be the first person to ever write a novel on a cell phone."

A Successful Wedding Party Returns From the Hunt

"I can really picture settling down and destroying a suburban family's attic with you."

'She wishes.'

"We're cyber criminals, Barnes, NOT common criminals. Go get cleaned up and look like you're tech-savvy."

"I've decided to give up my day to day responsibilities."

Feng Shui

Zzzzzzzzzzzzzz - 'How did my life get this dull?'

"Pawn to King Four."

"I consider myself to be a counterproductive member of society."

"Look! It came pre-defaced by the artist."

"Do you think this color hides my shifting paradigm?"

'They tried to GAG her but they can NEVER stop her 'dance of neglect on the ward'!'

A man exits his house to a clapboard.

'I didn't know I was going to sneeze.'

"Hi, I'm on the train."

'Good gracious Henry, it's not necessary to that every time he whistles the national anthem!'

It's the latest thing: a nicotine patch tie.

Master dog trainer.

A dictator makes a speech, about to be doused with water.

Occupy crunch

"That's the first time he's ever done anything spontaneous!"

TV Kill

"Polite company does not discuss religion, politics, education, gender, climate, diet, credit scores..."

do you like democrats of republicans? is that the only choice?

Radio phone-in: 'Hello, how are you' time wasters.

'Would you mind jumping in further down please?'