Decorating With Plants T-Shirts

Man enters a palm reading establishment carrying a tropical plant.

"I spilled a red dot of paint, so I painted the whole room so you wouldn't notice it."

Cocktails on the verandah.

"Maybe we should cut back on those lawn catalogues."

Santa Claus's Mail

'Fine stencilling. But have you never thought - Tit Willow, Tit Willow, Tit Willow?'

"Don't worry about your purchase not working. Everything we sell here is totally non-functional."

"This is going to make the most amazing driftwood table."

Maybe I should have measured my garden before going shopping....

Dog Hunting Trophies.

Christmas Tree

'Santa recalled thousands of toys ― he delivered them to kids who're in fact naughty.'

"I decided to go all out on the house decorations this year."

Adhesive Tiles: Do Not Open from this End.

Christmas tree with wadded up lights.

'That'll be four twenty for the beers and sixty quid for the Xmas decorations.'

Palms. When fully grown that species will provide some nice shade in your your yard. Fronds with benefits.

"Home depot."

Painting the Ceiling

Piranhaclaus

"Make yourself comfortable on my new decorative throw rocks."

Christmas in the Fish Bowl

"Maureen Alsop is leaving her magnolia, and her delphinium and her cats with us this weekend."

"You don't think it's too ungapatchka?"

Happy Easter

Turd - 'It's one of a kind.'

'And just what makes you think I don't know what I'm doing?!!'

"We made all the wheels out of old coffee tables and chandeliers."

"I may not know much about art, but I do know what's suitable for framing."

'How do you like my new, deep plush carpet?'

Yoga Xmas Decorations

"Which of these will look the prettiest without the others?"

Labor Day Flowers

Frosting the Snowman

"We're looking for something for our panic room."