Dating Navigators Gifts

"They're all for staying out of trouble."

Gaydar Repair

"Honey, this is serious, we need to text."

"I guess I misunderstood when I read you were into 'Bodybuilding'."

"Why do I feel like your mother is going to blame this on my cleaning?"

'Are you ready to be patronised yet?'

'Do you take this annoying woman to be your lawful wedded wife?'

"Your profile didn't mention you being a chewer."

"I'm just so relieved! I thought you didn't love me anymore, but now I realize I was just projecting!!"

"He says he loves me, but he still uses his first wife's birthday as his password."

'He's not so much a rough diamond, more a dumb block of carbon.'

"Uh-oh. The so-called marriage penalty."

'The blond guy is a forward and the other guy is a wing.'

"Do you, Amanda and John, promise to watch yourselves, mind your Ps and Qs, and generally step on eggshells in this marriage, in order to somehow keep it up and running for as long as possible?"

"Thanks for that."

'Your place or mine? Both. You go to your place and I'll go to mine!'

"No, Phil, I'm not grateful that we finally have some time alone."

'I'm sorry but I need my own space.'

Oh silly me, I'm trying to fix my glasses with nasal spray instead of super glue!

"It's not all your fault, some of it is my mother's!"

'I have rather a full schedule today. Could you summarize your grievances of the past 48 years?'

...In a Relationship

"I don't understand... I've scientifically proven that you were wrong. How can you still be mad at me?"

"You're not working as a crossing guard now, Brenda."

'We tried marriage your way and it didn't work. Now it's my way!'

"Once we're all vaccinated, will you still want to spend every waking moment together?"

'Come now - surely we can draw up this pre-nuptial agreement amicably.'

"I need a man who will commit."

"Merely dating" "Lover's leap" "Undecided? Take a hike"

"Life’s become pretty easy lately. Perhaps it’s time we shake things up by adding a dependent."

'It's our first date. You don't know me well enough to ask if I'm getting enough fiber.'

'I feel like I just don't know you anymore, Richard!'