Dating Joker T-Shirts

Missing Persons...'I'm not sure when she disappeared - sometime during the football season.'

Child laughs while making farting sound under arm. Dad says, 'Isn't it nice when they find something they're good at?

"Mating dance? Good luck with that. I couldn't even get my husband to do the chicken dance at our wedding."

Get crazy once in a while

How are you at decision making?

"I'll faithfully follow any diet plan as long as you also prescribe medical marijuana."

"Would you rather get hit by a racket or chewed by a dog?"

"April Fools'! You should’ve seen the look on your face!"

"Ok... for today I want a 500-word essay on what you know about nothing."

"You look so beautiful, glistening in the moonlight."

'Hey, Baby! How would you like to kiss the frog formerly known as 'Prince'?'

"He says that when he had a vegetable salad as an appetizer, he can now have burgers, pizza and Coke as a reward."

"I love it when your eyes blaze like that; you remind me of Moses."

'I'm going to try that 'vegan' thing, Joe -- give me some beer nuts.'

'Want to freak her out? Stare over her shoulder without blinking for 10 minutes.'

'...And do you John take Jennifer to be your lawfully wedded wife? To have and to hold, to write off on your taxes?'

Never pick a fight with a comedian.

'Half o' mild and a bag of pork scratchings - you're grooming me, aren't you?'

'When she walks in she lights up the room...' 'It's living next to the nuclear plant.'

It's not what's outside that interests me. It's what's inside!

"Whenever it comes, Glenda, my death will be untimely."

'I love it when you say - 'I'm going to print money'.'

Sunshine and exercise. Are you glad I suggested we go for a walk?

"I'm SO lazy, I married a pregnant woman. . . !"

'I've heard all about you. Jayne says you're quite the prankster.'

Face Mask Romance

See, Bill? They DID remember us this Valentine's Day!

'I ask myself-do I really want to sleep on the edge of the bed again?'

"I'll give you a big wet kiss.. "

Man playing with echos: 'Hellooooo...How are you....I love you...' 'I'm not ready for that kind of committment!'

Toilet humour

"It's me, Lucky—you can drop the best-friend shtick."

Wordplay: Mandate - Escort Agency.

"We could have a shoot-out, then brunch."