Dating Disaster Lover T-Shirts

"Actually, in my younger days, I was really a Wildman."

'Big date tonight, but I've just shed an antler: Do you have superglue?'

'Yeah, but this time she just said no -- there wasn't any hysterical laughter!'

"Good evening, I'm your date. Let me begin by saying I'm sorry I'm late, I'm sorry I'm bald and I'm sorry I'm short."

"I knew I should've swiped left."

'I hear Oog gave up inventing.'

Colin had heard that women liked honesty in men.

'It was disgusting, Sheila...Our first date, and he pulls out his endpin!'

"Your blind dates is at the bar - I'll upgrade you to a table by the getaway door."

"I walked up to this hot girl with two drinks in my hands, and she turned to me, smiled and said, are you lost, Grandpa? The toilets are back there."

"When you said on your profile you are 'loyal and affectionate' I expected something a little different."

'My Mother makes me wear this - It's my name and address in case I get lost.'

He couldn't put his finger on it but something told Colin the date wasn't going well.

"My love for you knows no bounds, Trish."

'If you remember, the last thing I said before the ship went down was, 'don't forget to bring the ball'.'

"How come I always pick the bastards?"

'Hand me your issue of esquire. I have a hot date.'

Tom suspected the date wasn't going as well as he'd hoped when she asked for the Emergency exit.

Geek Todd Jones strikes out with his 3000th wiman to take over third place on the all time geek strikeout list.

"So now I guess I'll have to meet your friends."

"Public display of rejection"

A young man creating an awkward silence

"He was a lousy date!"

'So, your place, or my mother's.'

"I see you've never dated a clairvoyant before."

"Can I call you back? I'm going down with the ship."

"A MacArthur, the lecture circuit, and thou!"

'Talk about a disastrous blind date: A quick look at her teeth told me she was a lot older than she said...'

'Reading between the lines Colin began to suspect that a second date was unlikely!'

Twenty thousand leagues out of his league

'This should teach you never to ask Naomi Campbell out on a date.'

Can't that dating service ever get it right?

"Just for future reference, save your private heartache for the third or fourth date."

"Don't get me wrong – I'm pro crazy bitches."