
'You'll have to excuse my date. He's still in beta.'
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'You'll have to excuse my date. He's still in beta.'
"Sure, it's more efficient. But I still miss shooting the arrows."
Online Dating
"I may be obsessive and I may be compulsive, but no way am I obsessive compulsive."
Kissable Frogs in Your Area
'Of all the women who responded to my dating profile, you had the best emoticon.'
Sally and Doug had met online and were proving to be very compatible...
'I was attracted to you but your online photo, but now that I've seen you in High-Def...'
"Ooo... she sounds nice... 'I enjoy burying myself in the sand and sideways walks on the beach.'"
"Just our luck. We finally see the 'feel good' movie of the year and it's December."
"Why don't you move over here, Mr. Lowery, where you'll be closer to everything."
"I'm not against going to couples therapy, but it feels weird to do it on a first date."
'Okay, but not in person -- I prefer on-line dating.'
'I need someone who is willing to make a commitment not someone who's just interested in ruffling my feathers.'
"Don't take this the wrong way, Howard, but I'd like to go back to having an on-line relationship."
"That guy I just met is already texting me pictures of his plumage."
'Take this stick-drive and open the file 'John's Emotional Baggage'. It'll save a lot of time.'
'As far as we can tell, the system went down because someone stepped on a crack in the sidewalk.'
"Romeo,Romeo. Are you online,Romeo"
Financially Secure Romantic with sufficient fire in belly seeks damsel in distress...
Romantic Coffee Dates
"It's funny how people suddenly come out of the woodwork when they know you're taken."
"Hey, no kidding! I prefer slow dancing, too!"
"Sorry, pal. I just need to make sure she likes me for me."
'That must be my computer date.'
"This is all very romantic, but I can't see my fork."
"What do you mean asking you to marry me via text wasn't romantic? Did you see the emoji with hearts for eyes I attached?"
"If someone winks a you forty or fifty times, are they coming on to you?"
We met online.
"You're not at all like your answering machine."
"So, do you walk the talk? Replete the tweet? Sext the text?"
'You want to discuss the glitches in the software I sent you? No, Tuesday's out - how about never - is never okay?'
"AI can now scan dating sites and find your best match."
Friday night was always sext night.
'We met online.'
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