Date Night Storyteller T-Shirts

'He was so cute! I touched his arm, and guess what? He said, 'Jeepers, Creepers'!'

"Oh, Jeff, you swore this wasn't a podcast."

Asking out a palm reader.

'I'm not afraid of commitment, but forever is a really long time.'

'When you asked me over for a home-cooked meal, I assumed you'd be making it.'

When we met, you told me you make a lousy first impression. Well, guess what: You also make a lousy second impression. Actually, my only decent impression is Kirk Douglas. Wanna hear it?

"You seem dangerous. I like that."

In Desperate Straits.

'It wouldn't hurt to say a few words.'

"There's no way we can get him ow. He's completely under the covers."

'Don't be silly - the sun won't burn itself our for another 5 billion years. Bedsides, the Earth will have been smashed to smithereens by asteroids long before that.'

'I'm doing a wine tasting course, it's fascinating. . .'

'May I recommend a dry white with the seafood dish.'

Two men wearing laurels and holding hands

'You forgot your glasses again, didn't you?'

'I've spent a fortune wining and dining you today Julie and now you tell me you love Picasso!'

"Papi, I heard something!"

"So much for watching a Jane Austen movie with my date. He kept waiting for the car chase!"

Sharing Drinks.

"I was really impressed by the way you sent back the wine, though it did come in second to the waiter's uppercut."

"Do you have anything that would make him seem like a self satisfied pig?"

"If they give you any trouble, find a good babysitter and go out for the evening."

"Well, if you must know, he makes me laugh."

He's mumbling again! What do you think husbands dream about?

"I hope this guy isn't as dull as he looks."

"I know you're baby-sitting, Peggy. . . I just didn't think they'd be sitting right here!"

“Here’s to the 240 bucks we’re paying the sitter.”

"And What Wine Would You Suggest To Go With An Argument?"

"I don't know - I feel like we always split the cheese plate."

'It wouldn't work - you're Leo and I'm Sagittarius.'

The End is Night

'He seems nice.'

'Cute girl from philosophy. . . BBQ at Dave's. I wonder if she's going?. . . Flat meeting to talk about me not doing my share.'

'I seem to be very conservative but secretly, I'm a rebel - I don't wear pants.'

'This dinner had everything necessary to make it perfect...Great food, candlelight, violinist... you clutching your chest after seeing the check.'