Data-driven Thinkers Pillows

'That's it? Months of study, endless reports, and all we come up with is 'everyone should stay home more'?'

"I'd say we were pretty much on target."

The Googler

'Why can't you tell me you love me without all the charts and graphs?!'

"That recruitment algorithm we’ve been using, I think we need to revisit it!"

'I like scientists: They are genuinely interested in every mundane thing we do and keep detailed records...'

"Note the spike here, when the state legalized marijuana."

"Daddy is off to work in a data mine."

Us. Everyone else. My research shows that we are the only statistics company sill using pie charts displayed on an easel.

"When I grow up I hope to get into data storage."

'Remind me to never again ask him what he learned in school.'

"I hate it when the palcebo does better than the drugs we're testing."

"I hear you have been split testing our online advertising campaign. I haven't got a clue what that is but stop it now."

"I wasn't copying off others. I was just crowdsourcing the answers."

Man stabbed by fallin arrow on wall chart.

"And these projections are based solidly on hope, crossed fingers, and fear."

"Graphs are like EKGs, they show the health of a company."

'This must be the effect of the climate change! Even the data cloud has started to rain!'

"Remarkable, but I'd feel so much better about it if we knew what the hell we're doing right."

''The Thinker' is an outdated concept.'

"Embarrassing things that happen to you in the bedroom stay in the bedroom. . . and on facebook."

"Business has been steady."

'Our sabermetrics guy has confirmed that last year's team that went 60-102 was bad.'

'Look at these accident statistics. What can't the government do something about it?'

"According to google, yahoo and bing, the meaning of life is 'more data space'."

'Sanders, our numbers on google are slipping, let's pump up the keywords.'

"Sorry darling, you can't go for a kill tonight. It's census night, it would mess up the data!"

"What's the point of school? We can just look all this stuff up on wikipedia."

"If it weren't for you, we'd have nothing in the cloud."

Couple in bed with health charts

Social media and privacy

Evolution in the Era of the Selfie

The Pie Chart of Mystery

"We can't make the perfect product, but with a little luck and a lotta data, we can make the perfect customer."

You can have your privacy back, as soon as I've finished showing it to everyone