Daily Journey Humorist Pillows

'I found a new way to the office through Syria.'

"Don't be embarrassed. Most heroic archetypes your age have lost the ability to swashbuckle."

Leaning Tower -After a bottle, Jean noticed the tower stopped leaning.

Dear Diary. . . why, oh why, did I choose an adventure holiday?

Airport Security.

'Camping is nature's way of promoting B&Bs.'

The Euro-Trash Trashcan

"Let's see, I make it four suitcases, a rolling bag, and a tote bag... You sure that's enough for our two day trip?"

'Do you have any specific regulations concerning travelling with pets?'

Bob's Driving School.

'Hang on a second, I think I have a sand castle in my shoe.'

"Didn't you just say that?"

'Agreed, 40 years is a long time to wander around, but think of the travel expenses.'

"We're off. We got a loan to fill er up!"

"It's hard being a grownup, too – did you know we have absolutely zero limits on treats?"

"My guess it's guacamole."

'If the GPS has to tell you, 'No, we're not there yet' one more time...'

"I thought they just hibernated for the winter."

"Rule #1: don't offer to carry anything!"

'This one is a bit different - twelve Indian call centres in eight days.'

Billy strip: comic will make you sick.

"Well, we did book the Grill Suite I suppose."

'Are we there yet! Are we there yet! Are we there yet!'

'Our trip to Florida was great until Rob took us driving with the dolphins.'

Vampire on a plane

'I've been sitting on this mountain for 25 years, and what I've learned is that true happiness can only be found in the soothing relief of a fast-acting hemorrhoid cream!'

'I can validate both your feelings and your parking.'

The leaning tower of Pizza.

A pocket of pygmies - "Have you anything to declare sir?"

"Okay, ha ha, now seriously...Where's the rest of the nuts?"

'Your luggage went to Bosnia-Herzegovina, sir, and I'm afraid they're holding it for ransom.'

Biliard Enthusiast

'I'm just here on a lay-over.'

Val and Les could see a fork in the road but they weren't expecting a dip.