Cycle Time Traveler T-Shirts

Prehistoric bikes and their advanced helmets.

"Let's just say I have a pre-existing condition."

"Meet the scribe"

Historical memory is on life support.

'That's about it so far, Son.'

"We're following Carrot Top."

"So then, after I'd invented my time machine, I thought: why not go back and visit the good old days?"

Second hand furniture.

'My luck, I buy a bottle of wine from 450 B.C. and it's still five years from reaching maturity.'

Pinocchio's Second Realization

"Wait... what was it I came up here for?"

"Damn. I took the Rip Van Nyquil."

"About how if the dark ages never happened we'd be so much more technologically advanced by now."

"Early model of baggage claim"

Sundial Time

"Please! No harmonizing during ululations!"

"Let's see, I make it four suitcases, a rolling bag, and a tote bag... You sure that's enough for our two day trip?"

'I'd say it's six of one and one half doxen of the other.'

Time for vacation, time for work.

"I'm going to prove that Math comes in handy later in life."

'You know what they say - 'Those who don't learn the lessons of history are doomed to go to summer school.''

Danger Slow Sand.

'When I met him he was all bright and shiny - now he's a rust bucket.'

"We have plenty of time to catch the ark."

"This just in... the country has adopted a 24 hr military clock... ...details at 23."

'I used to spring forward. Now all I can do is fall back.'

You had me at vintage.

"It seems like only yesterday that Dad told me I'll be an adult before I know it."

"I don't know who you are!"

"More quarters! For God's sake, more quarters!!"

'This new game isn't working out -- the ball keeps running away.'

'I like the history professor but I think he's mired in the past.'