Customer Service Associate Pillows

'This is an 8 1/2. Do you have it in a size 9?'

STRIP Hambone: Installation

Lost and found and lost again.

'Noticeboard? I forgot it was there to be honest.'

"My email is down... talk to me."

"I’ve combined all your outstanding debt into what we here in the banking business like to call a honkin’ big loan."

Kiosk in large lobby with sign above it labeled 'Empathy'.

'Our product flooded the market... Before backing up a deluge of consumer complaints!'

'That's it then - I'll take the slinky high-heeled cocktail number in a 5 and the everyday workshoe in a 7...'

"Worst case of month-end burnout I ever saw."

Men find this shampoo irresistible. It's called 'Gee, Your Hair Smells Like A New Car'.

"I think I'll be late back for tea. . . about a week."

Sale on the same stuff as last week.

"Why won't you teach us how to handle complaints?"

Handbag store - "Perfect."

"Now that's what I call customer service!"

'...We apologise for any inconvenience this may cause..."

Cut Price

"I want something that will make Richard Burton sit up and take notice."

'If this is tea, I'll have a coffee. If it's a coffee, I'll have a tea!'

"What do I do to relieve stress? I meditate, about not working here."

"You know, there are other emojis."

"Tonight, perhaps Mrs. Lewis would prefer this quiet little table for two from which to send back her entrée?"

"Who's taking my order—the committee of the whole, or is there a liaison for decaf?"

'No, Mr. Simmons, your MR images aren't in yet. We have older equipment, which takes a little longer to process.'

'Yes, as a matter of fact, you have caught me at a bad time.'

'You can forget the Captain's table-we're not paying that kind of money just to eat with the crew!'

Vending machine: NO stress, only 50 cents.

"Remember Mr. Cockbundle is not just a 'customer', he is an important source of valuable and readily marketable data."

Grim Reaper rowing a boat full of dead souls to the afterlife; a tip jar sits on the side of the boat.

"Philosophy Department. Why may I direct your call?"

'If you're having trouble finding what you want, try our other store--'Cabernet Sauvignons Starting with the Letter B'.'

"This bag is carry-on, and this one is kick-drop-throw-and-pile-on."

"I can't get used to being a grownup."

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