Customer Care Professional T-Shirts

"I'm overworked underpaid and stressed as hell. . . what do you have to complain about?"

"Worst case of month-end burnout I ever saw."

"Maybe now, we could look at customer care'?"

Maybe it's now time to review our customer care strategy!"

"We add an eighteen percent gratuity for parties of six or more."

"And for my next trick, I will confuse general politeness for chemistry."

"May I take your plate or are you still nibbling?"

'It feels warm enough to me.'

Night-shift entrance

'Wow, are all these desserts for here, or are you going to stuff your faces in the privacy of your own home?'

'How would you like your toast?'

'Alternatively you can just focus on the CUSTOMER!'

'I don't want to talk to any flunkies. Put me straight through to the computer.'

Rapunzel's short-lived career in the restaurant business.

"Ah, the waiter ... And I was beginning to wonder if we really existed!"

"Okay, ha ha, now seriously...Where's the rest of the nuts?"

"How do you prepare the chicken?"

'We've run out of Parmesan cheese.' Food in pasta.

"I like Casual Dining, but this is too casual. I ordered spaghetti!"

"Don't make me send over the bad waitress."

"Fresh-raked leaves?"

"As an expert in loyalty, Fido will create an emotional bond with each customer."

"For an extra charge, your flight can come with angst and insecurity."

'Sorry to keep you waiting, sir.'

"The legal people are terrified of litigation but I insisted that we write an apology to the client of the lack of service. . . as long as we don't sent it!"

Pizza Delivery Delays

Rent-a-Drama: "How many tweens will you need for your event?"

"Could you spare a few minutes to give some feedback on your death experience?"

"Is anyone enjoying anything?"

'My after-dinner mint was bigger than my steak.'

Metropolitan Prize Puzzles.

"Providing the kind of service the customer is paying for could be a serious hassle."

"Certainly. A party of four at seven-thirty in the name of Dr. Jennings. May I ask whether that is an actual medical degree or a Ph.D.?"

'John, this is where you should declare your underlying love and tell Miriam she's the wind beneath your wings...'

No Cabin Crew Self Service.