Current Affairs Jester T-Shirts

Senator Giveth Yields to Senator Taketh Away!

'Well, they certainly caught you kipping!'

'My reading comprehension is so-so, but I do make up for it with my highlighting skills.'

'Look -- I'm willing to forget about all this if you are.'

"For the sake of not being redundant, your honor, I feel that one 'bad dog' is sufficient."

"He's actually my co-counsel, but you may scratch his head."

Mission Kinda Accomplished

'Your Honor, my client would like to wave his right to a speedy trial.'

'Ms. Blumter, please get me a copy of Educational Leadership for Dummies.'

A baby in court

Books / Coffee table books

Bush farewell.

'Your Honor, we've decided to go with the inanity defense...'

"That does it! ISIS is defeated."

"Are you trying to show contempt for this court."

"But seriously do you think my eclectic knowledge of the history of the development of the claw hammer makes me more of a sex magnet?"

"Honestly, I have no idea what a 'habeas corpus' is."

'No, no. I told you to look for a precedent.'

"In mitigation, Sunny Chemicals would like to point out that prior to contracting his skin allergy, Mr Crumb was already ugly."

Shakespeare today

"Gracie, don't worry so much about your big test... You know, when I was your age, I didn't know the meaning of the word 'fear'. Until I looked it up."

"'Article I. Section 9. Claus B. No title of nobility shall be granted by the United States' - we gotta change that."

"...And now show us what you said."

The Deal of a Century

"I'd like an application form for the position of minister, please!"

Disorder in the Court!

"I don't plead."

"These days, I'm mostly just legislating from the couch."

'I'm afraid that driving the getaway car is more than just a driving offence, Mr. Jones.'

"My client pleads not guilty, by reason that everyone else is doing it."

"How was I supposed to know she was allergic?"