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Your English teacher says you use too many Americanisms.

Out of kilter.

'The puritans enjoy a real good laugh'

'I did enjoy it, but I would prefer it without the singing.'

Paranoid Sheep

The Great Mall of China.

"Oh, Yeah...that's right...you discovered America!"

"So how come you call it a kilt?"

No one ever tried to rob the Samurai Bank.

"Hey! Whoa, whoa, whoa! I don't know what you guys are doing, but it's certainly not a rain dance!!"

Welsh airport arrivals.

'Well if you hate confrontations, why did you become a bull fighter?'

"Ok clss pls trn ur pprs ovr n strt :)"

'That Rodin guy's spying on us again.'

Stephen Harpers's China Diary - Great Wall Tour.

"It's nothing to do with being green, but there are cultural implications."

"I'm just waiting to become fashionable again"

'What sort of job did you do in Poland?'

"I don't know art, but I know what I like!"

The Garrick Theatre

An English of eccentrics

"Perhaps you are looking for a different Wailing Wall?"

"Try a French one!"

'I see that you a degree in comparative societal cultures. We're prepared to offer you a job as an unpaid intern in our shipping department.'

'Liverpudlians are reknowned for their sense of humour.'

'I think we can be fairly sure that this one is not a Banksy.'

"Did I say Henny Youngmen? I meant to say Sergei Prokofiev."

"A poll of New York City voters indicates that the topic they're most concerned with is the British monarchy."

The Euro-Trash Trashcan

'You didn't really look up Easter Island, did you, Richard?'

"If it's in a museum, you're allowed to look."

"I thought I was going to be much more blown away by the Liberty Bell."

Used to it.

New York vs. Chicago

"How was your day trip to France, Tom?"