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NO Damn Silverware...Authentic Chinese Cuisine

"I was with you right up to the cumin."

"Boil, toil and trouble, I wish I'd never started this risotto."

"And which regional cuisine would you be interested in this evening—Northwester, Southwestern, Southeastern, or Northeastern?"

"When I was your age. I was really smelly."

'Why, of course I remember our first date -- I had filet mignon, potatoes au gratin, sauteed....'

'Only the years when the market was Bullish...'

'Like death by salad.'

Two books: 'The Joy of Cooking' next to 'The Joy of Dieting'.

Try to guess the continent dining...

"Tonight, perhaps Mrs. Lewis would prefer this quiet little table for two from which to send back her entrée?"

Heavy man sees 'Comfort Food' aisle

'We can order Lebanese, Thai, Italian, Indian, Greek or Chinese...'

"Oh, look- French! Let's try it."

'Strained carrots again! What am I being punished for this time?'

Important Food Groups

Nothing like traveling hundreds of miles to immerse yourself in art for the sole purpose of killing time between meals.

"I've never heard of it, either, but nothing ventured, nothing gained, I always say!"

"Don't you just hate restaurants that make you feel rushed?"

French wine

Barbecued dessert, anyone? The coals are PERFECT now!

"Everything taste so divinely artisanal."

Gaston's Gourmet Truckstop

Leaning Wine Bottle of Pisa

Your lobster was off!

"Hi. What kind of wine goes with fruit salad?"

Our visit to the flan factory.

Sauce for the Goose

"I cook the sausages in French mineral water, I wear a French beret and I can call you 'Monsieur'."

"All of tonight's specials dance around the whole GMO thing."

"I feel like pushing the envelope this morning, honey, starting with a little grape jelly for that bran muffin."

Before/After

'Burl says it only works with corn though if you want to try it.'

'See? You call my look 'a midlife crisis' but for these guys it's a major TV series.'

"From right to left, you have your tekkamaki, your futomaki, and then your yamaimo roll. The little pile of pink stuff is ginger, the green one's wasabi. And, of course, you already recognize your vodka martini."