Culinary Writer Gifts

Anthony Bourdain with Chopsticks

"The menu just says fried fish, but may I give you a more compelling, surprisingly lyrical description?"

"Together ideas for couples" "Slap a sandwich together" "Put two and two together" "Pull themselves together" "Rub two sticks together" "Try to hold it together" "String a phrase together"

We need a new eco project. Ok. Let's get locally grown food into the school cafeteria. What's our strategy? We can start with the potatoes. I'll make the poster. We want home fries.

Soup of the month.

"Jill Hamster's entrepreneurial disaster"

'My diet's good...I'm two weeks ahead of schedule.'

"Christmas drinks 'n' nibbles system"

'Er . . . and a fork for me...'

Garden.

Man with 'Real Ale' written on t-shirt, woman with 'Real Pine' written on rolling pin

"I call it 'rage loaf'."

Elfian lady grilling on mushroom: 'Summertime in the Enchanted Forest'.

Too much cilantro

Canape?

Health and Safety Gone Mad.

"It's the sequel to 'Cooking for One'."

I love Cannelloni

'Don't let him pick the wine. He thinks Dom Perignon was someone who got knocked off on the Sopranos.'

Holiday Supplies

'You're lucky there, Sir. That's the last one in the world.'

"Ooooooh, just what I wanted!"

"Hmm...I LOVE chocolate chip ice cream...!"

"It was wonderful, Henri. Arnold had died and gone to heaven."

"It's smells so good, but why do you have to wait so long?!"

"My only love sprung from my only hate!"

Baker Romance

'It's the essence of springtime. You're really enjoying it.'

'I was in the catering corps.'

'Do you want me to get the fish bone out, or not?'

In the DNA Kitchen

Restaurant Chef with book titled: 'Introduction To Cooking'.

Fly Tastings: 'Notice that hint of dog fur and then let that full bodied garbage finish unfold.'

"Please don't kill me."

Victorian Fast Food - 'I'll have the lark pie festooned with eels, a full stilton, two bottles of port,,,'