Culinary Avant-garde Lover Pillows

"It's a deconstructed steak pie and 12 lagers."

"It's kohlrabi, the next hot vegetable."

Frank and Ernie's Diner. We're all out of pressed duck, sir, but I can put the squeeze on some chicken for you.

Church Basement Foodie

Yoko Ono

'I told you not to complain about the hospital food!'

Recipe involving the switching off of the smoke alarm...

'and then stand in dish for two hours.'

"Then add one extra large egg..."

"I'll bet you're very proud of your handsome, well-behaved little sporks here."

"Not tonight. Margie wants to watch some guy deep fry a duck on cable."

'Therapy?'

It's all gravy.

'You made me jump.'

'The bloke with the violin is on holiday.'

"Stick to the specials and no one gets hurt."

Pizza with 'Made in China' imprinted on it.

Give me a child at seven and I will show you the MAN!

Thanksgiving Game Highlights

Deviled HamDeviled Eggs.

'Barry, I think I know where you left the champagne bottle.'

"Here comes the tossed salad!"

"1 pinch of salt, 3 pinches of baking soda...oh dear, a cup of flour? How many pinches is that?"

"Your father dressed you, didn't he?"

"Ooops...well, at least you now can see that there are a lot of fresh mushrooms in our soup!"

"I'm sorry about the delay, sir, but Chef's anger management class ran over."

"Hmmm, I'm not sure – I’ll ask our chef when he sobers up."

Not that one. It's got the chips in it.

Out and In.

Salvador Deli

'We need more cake shows!'

"Potatoes too salty? Look, buster ??" I told you to enjoy your meal!"

"I'd rather be seared by Emeril than sauteed by Rachel."

Bob's BBQ Aprons: The Spring Collection

"Is that your answer for everything...fold in a stick of butter?"