Cubicle Escape Artists Gifts

Man leaving his office with his computer tangled around his leg,

"So what kind of mood is he in?"

"This position has become very important to the company."

"Well, ordinary men have colleagues. Successful men have victims."

"They decided giving out pink slips was too impersonal. So now they're blue."

A disgruntled employee chain-sawes hois boss's desk in two.Boss says:'Alright Smith, I'll stop referring to the employees as 'oopsy daisies'.'

"I hate performance review season."

"I'm thinking of turning this home office into a man-cubicle."

'Here's another one that'll make you blow your stack.'

Shake it all about sign on desk

'Here comes the boss. Quick, look busy!'

'Your main goal in this job is getting out alive.'

'We'd just like to get away from all leading economic indicators for a while.'

'Think of this as a window of opportunity.'

Torn-Off Mouse.

"Back when I was your age the only way to get a promotion was kissing butt."

"Hope you weren't planning on leaving early."

'Hey, I'm not paying you people to watch the clock. That's Henderson's job.'

"They don't pull their punches here, do they."

'Congratulations on your purchase of the new Kablooey! Desk Organizer! Instructions for use...'

"I misjudged you Fenton. I thought you were a 'mover and shaker' but all the time you were just bobbing and weaving."

''A desk job.' That's what they called it at the interview.' 'Same here.' 'SHH!'

"So you're just now tellin' me I was hatched from an egg and I coulda' left years ago?!?"

Suggestion box which shreds forms placed in it.

Just don't let the old man get you down.

"I find it best to stay out of office politics!"

I can outsource your job to someone who'll work longer hours for less money. Less money I can understand...but how do they make the hours longer than 60 minutes?

"It is what it is."

Darren had lost his edge as a 'yes' man...

"Always carry a ball with you! If you are chased by a dog, stop, show the ball and throw it. Believe me, he won't be able to resist chasing it instead of you..."

"Damn it,Frank,if I can't bully my staff, who can I bully?"

"Gentlemen, I've called this meeting to discuss absenteeism."

"Pendleton, as of noon today your services will no longer be required. Meanwhile, keep up the good work."

America Off-line.

"I think your idea of stress relief is drastic!"