Cubicle Comic Gifts

'That's our mission statement.'

Al, The Go-From Guy

'It's true that gernerally speaking, work space is getting smaller, but in your case, that hasn't happened.'

'I'm going to have to transfer you to someone I don't like.'

"Don't think of it as getting fired. Think of it as finally being recognized for your incompetence."

"I've got an office and I've got a window, but I wouldn't say I've got a window office."

"He no longer works here."

"Staff shortages and increased workloads means all leave has been cancelled...but as compensation we are being offered enhanced toilet breaks!"

"...We've clubbed together to get you something as a token of our appreciation. I think the staples are included."

'Are we replacing you with a computer? Ha! That's a good one. If we replaced you with a chimpanzee it would be over qualified.'

Not a good day - he's counting paper-clips.

'I don't think you understand the gravity of this situation.'

'We need to get out in front of our problems with a scapegoat.'

'Felworth, until you've completed your management training program, I'll have to ask you not to fool around with your desk.'

"To be honest the culture sucks, but the pay is amazing."

After years of working in an office without a door, Doug was moved to a door without an office.

"So what kind of mood is he in?"

"This position has become very important to the company."

"Well, ordinary men have colleagues. Successful men have victims."

"They decided giving out pink slips was too impersonal. So now they're blue."

We should take a break. Ron's eyes have turned into spinning rainbow wheels.

A disgruntled employee chain-sawes hois boss's desk in two.Boss says:'Alright Smith, I'll stop referring to the employees as 'oopsy daisies'.'

"I hate performance review season."

"I'm thinking of turning this home office into a man-cubicle."

In many ways this is the perfect job! Out. Out.

Shake it all about sign on desk

'Here's another one that'll make you blow your stack.'

'Here comes the boss. Quick, look busy!'

'Your main goal in this job is getting out alive.'

"Back when I was your age the only way to get a promotion was kissing butt."

'Hey, I'm not paying you people to watch the clock. That's Henderson's job.'

"They don't pull their punches here, do they."

'Congratulations on your purchase of the new Kablooey! Desk Organizer! Instructions for use...'

Torn-Off Mouse.

"I misjudged you Fenton. I thought you were a 'mover and shaker' but all the time you were just bobbing and weaving."