Cryogenic Comedy Lover T-Shirts

Ace Cryogenics (Giant toaster).

'No! No more harps! I can't take it anymore.'

Ghostwriting the Bible

'...heard the one about the Venusian, the Martian and the Saturnian?'

"We can't Sunday. We've been invited to 'you know who's' skybox."

'No! No more harps! I can't take it anymore.'

'The bank says they're freezing my assets! I don't understand: They've always been frozen...'

"Some mid-life crisis that turned out to be."

Weatherman: "Tonight's weather forecast is confusing, followed tomorrow by downright bewildering."

'Can you believe it? - The doofus doesn't know whether this is the Alpha Quadrant or not!'

"It's Houston. They have a problem."

"Just the steak for me and my friend will have the carbon dioxide and the water with the sunlight."

A businessman sits behinds a desk with a nameplate that reads "Charles F. Baxter - Previously frozen".

"It is called A Night to Remember. It portrays a ritual mating dance from the early 21st-century."

'Can you believe it? - This hayseed doesn't even know which GALAXY we're in!'

Man Reading story 'U.F.O. Sighted' with alien peeking over his shoulder.

'I've had a toothache for the last million light years, take me to your dentist.'

"Venice! What will climate change think of next?"

'You were married to him for 40 years. He never once mentioned he was having his head cryogenically frozen?'

'They did it again - not a word in the weather report about an ice age.'

"I'll pass on reincarnation. I'm glad that I don't live in the age of Trump!"

'Great! Thanks to the damn mortage crisis, we've got to live in a neighbourhood now where we wake up with yellow feet every second morning...'

'I was chatting with Krog when, out of the blue, that thing fell on him.'

'It was a split decision.'

"Oh, yes, he's bad. But in a good way."

Alien throwing out astronaut with the rubbish.

"Captain...I'm detecting Hemorrhoids off our starboard bow."

"Oh boy, the forecast is "Freezing" today, and then "Deep Freeze" for the next two days..."

"Any requests?"

"You're going to have to get rid of that uniform."

Carbon suicide

'Me? Twinkling? -- I thought YOU were twinkling.'

Gas Cow

'Sir, you're not going to believe this but the vatican is preparing to move into our territory.'