Crowd Wrangler Gifts

"You have reservations for 7 o'clock? Ideally..."

The Baby Walker

Invasion Of The Summer Aliens

So you're a mocking bird...

"We've decided your suggestion to have a day care center here at work has merit."

Teaching a Sunday school class didn't end the way John imagined.

'I'm lost, did you happen to see a lady without a boy like me ?'

A trevor of trainspotters

"Mom, can you come get me?"

"Can you read the part about Job again?"

'Whatever surprise he's cooking up for you, I'm sure you've a good sense of humour!'

"I'll be a bit late... sorry."

"This is System One and I am holding the beta for System Two."

'There! Now he's tied to my satisfaction and ready for surgery!'

Parenting Business Deals

"Bogeyman under your bed? Oh, no, sweetie, there's no room under there… unlike your closet."

"Bye now... it's always nice to see you and little Tommy!"

'It's your babysitter, where do you keep your fire extinguisher?'

The First Day Back

Quiet Time

'I took her to register in kindergarten, and they wanted a damage deposit.'

Nanny with children on leash

"My dog always knows when it's about to rain."

'We are considering a nursery expansion.'

'You can always tell the pediatricians.'

Kindergarten Primary School Teacher

"Are you sure they don't include children?"

A kangaroo mother with a joey in her main pouch and a juice box in a separate smaller pouch.

Parental Training Course

"Today is the day I start the new me!"

"Fred's a man for all seasons. The lawn still needs mowing but he's set for leaf blowing."

'You gotta learn to talk, Jeffrey - it's part of the aging process.'

'Sorry, Holly!'

"I'v got this center-of-the-universe gig."

"All the world's gotta do is look at me once, and I'll tap dance until I die."