Crime Family Enthusiast Pillows

"A word of fatherly advice, Marty: keep your friends close and your enemies even closer. That way there's no room for useless in-laws to squeeze in."

Mario's Family Portraits.

The Elliot Ness monster.

"Don't make me warn you again, monkey. Stay outa the curiosity racket."

"I don't have my law degree yet but I've got an internship down in cell block 'D'."

OK! I promise that the questions will be easy!

"Don't editorialize."

"Number 2. Step forward please."

"Tax evasion is like a cancer, it's growing exponentially!"

'The good news is your life sentence is about over.'

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'Keep an eye on that one. He looks like a sketchy character to me.'

'You know, this is a pretty dangerous line of work you're in...'

'The police is looking for a teenager who reads books... I bet they'll never solve this case!'

'Looks like the victim was trying to tell us something,'

'With the kind cooperation of the underworld, we present live, for the first time on TV, an actual holdup.'

"Take your time, sir. Tell me if you can see the thief."

Mafia Family Life: 'I'm sorry dear - but I had to bring some work home!'

"They've solved the cause of death of Richard III."

Bribery and Corruption.

"Apparently we have an informant in our midst."

Gangster's To-Do List

Ignorance of the Law

'Make it look like an accident.'

Back in 2 to 5 years.

'That's him. Number 3 is the one who attacked me.'

'Was Monty the culprit? Had he fixed a horse race? He couldn't remember.'

A convict escaping during the press scrum

'Our crime figures are down!'

"I believe this is a case for Sherlock Holmes..."

Bank Robbery Statistics

Exposed and imprisoned.

"Don't worry, honey. This is just for our murder podcast."