Creation Wit Gifts

"Intelligent design...well, duh!"

"This position has become very important to the company."

Too Many Lawyers Spoil the Broth

Snowprov

Backfire

"Stop the drama. Take that wig off and wait 'till spring like everyone else."

C'mon, it'll be fun! I'll throw on some stars, pop in a few planets, drum up a life form or two, and this place will be hoppin'! The Big Shebang Theory.

I'm a self-made man!

'How would you feel about working in a small pond?'

"A one-word email reply... classic power move."

Czarcasm

Doggone

'Wait a minute - How do we break a tie?'

'You'll get five paid sick days, plus an additional two when you're shedding your skin.'

'Don't fall for all that...you should see him first thing in the morning.'

How are you at decision making?

Man cutting hedge next to two heads impaled on sticks. Signs beneath say 'You missed a bit' and 'You can do mine next'.

Hang on...I've got WINGS..!!!

'We'd like to pay you what you're worth, too, Fenstrom. Unfortunately we must conform to the minimum wage law.'

'What you seem to be suffering from is longevity.'

'Once, long ago, I thought I was wrong...but it turned out I was mistaken.'

He used to pass the buck, since being promoted to management he gets to call it delegating authority.

"Your credentials are impressive, Carter but... quite frankly, Mr. Biggles doesn't seem to like you."

'No, this metal stress can't be fixed with liberal doses of antidepressants.'

"For cryin' out loud, Frank, we don't have all day! Cut to the cheese!"

"That's a very difficult problem to address, Ted, could you restate it as a solution?"

'A man has to believe in something. I believe I'll have another drink!'

"Damn it,Frank,if I can't bully my staff, who can I bully?"

It is believed dear Jack finally figured out women. Trouble is, he died laughing before he could tell anybody.

"I'm starting slowly with a trainer who just stands around talking about his personal life."

'I'm working with a bunch of cavemen.'

"No more thinking outside the box Bamford. From now on I want you to do all your thinking inside your box!"

"Pregnant!... How did that happen? We took precautions, like not having sex!"

"Miss Jones, bring me into the 21st century..."

'Please Henderson - Not another one of your bright ideas!'