Creating A Dating Profile Prints

'Of all the women who responded to my dating profile, you had the best emoticon.'

Kissable Frogs in Your Area

'We no longer look at résumés. We go straight to your Facebook page.'

'Okay, but not in person -- I prefer on-line dating.'

I couldn't resist his pickup line. He said he had a job.

"To meet the girl of your dreams, swipe right on the lamp."

"Hi, I'm Miranda: I like sniffing bums, rolling about in dead things and chasing tennis balls. . ."

'On the internet, nobody knows you're a monkey.'

"If they say 'Rubensesque' in their profile, they mean they're a Botero."

"It's not enough -- others must follow me on social media."

Women Seeking Men

Small Talk

You have: 2,010,597 matches

The singles bar...

"So when you said you were a bee keeper..."

"Are you 'Athletic, bronzed male, early thirties seeking buxom, fun-loving younger female'?"

'The internet brings everyone closer.'

"Alexa, you're not quite what I was expecting!"

"What should I use for our scream name?"

"What should I use for our scream name?"

"It turns out there was a computer error – we weren't made for each other after all."

Frank's endless supply of cheap dates.

I met him online.

"I posted dozens of cat pictures on social media to meet women. Then one dated me and ran off with my cat."

'It seems we've both been a bit imaginative in creating our online profiles.'

"Gee, you didn't mention your wart in your personal."

'Your dating profile was right. You really do know how to show a girl a good time.'

'Another for our 'GSOH' file.'

'I think I would get along really well with someone as disagreeable as me.'