Creamery Worker Pillows

"Nothing says butter - like something from the udder."

"Good For You / Bad For You"

Give us a drink that says "we're in love." Oh no, not again. Today's Special. Latte + 1hr web $12.50. We're back together. We're celebrating. Give us my darling pudding pie's favorite drink. A cinnamon mocha latte with a peppermint lollipop swizzle stick. Excuse me?! That is not my favorite drink ... dear. My favorite drink is a cinnamon mocha latte with a spearmint lollipop swizzle stick ... dear. I am so sorry ... snookums. How could I have possibly been so heartless and thoughtless as to con

School Cafeteria. It's the start of the school year. The Geometry teacher will come by to verify that we're serving truly square meals. The grammar teacher says the alphabet soup is runny and needs some punctuation added. History teachers keep a record of all the past meals and so will notice any leftovers being served. And the computer lab staff expressed concern about all the cookies so the astronomy teacher suggested switching to candy for dessert. I'll bet she thinks Starburst and Milk

But is it organic?

'Wake up, dear...did you order extra milk?!'

Thank you, Essential Workers

"Mom, I'm at work – let me call you back after I finish stocking milk for wealthy vegans who like beet juice in their meat alternatives so they can still get that bloody effect when cooking without guilt."

"We're odd looking but just as good."

"I want some long, thin square ones - for chips..."

Another day in the Splenda mines

'Tesco's cheif executive meets with staff.'

Cafe Burns.

Only One Item or Fewer.

Raphnrrf? Raphnrrf? Umpha? Frfee? Maamr? Pick.

Ghostbasters 3

'I don't think much to faith school dinners.'

'Any chance of a ploughman's?'

Lemon Harangue Pie Mix

'Frank, leak to the tabloids that these slow moving broccoli flakes cure cancer.'

Barnyard humor.

"I didn't realize there was so many different kinds of vegetables!"

Food samples in supermarket - 'There's a stick in mine.'

'I just couldn't think of the word poultry.'

Biker chopper shopper

'I hate it when they order scrambled eggs.' (chef shaking chicken).

"...and most of all, thank you for pre-cooked holiday meals from the supermarket!"

'They send you into the ketchup department? HA! I'M going into pizza!'

If Einstein had worked in Fast Food

"I tried to hire a hamburger fry cook from a fast food joint for our cafeteria but he wouldn't take the cut in pay."

'It's just a casual job for the summer.'

'And since this product consists of 100% artificial ingredients, we can truthfully say it's vegan!'

"Sugar, trans fats, and an adorable dead baby lamb. Cash back?"

It all began with free-range chicken. Then it was organic vegetables. Next the farmers decided they should all take a year off to go find themselves.

"Arrghh! - I came around the corner and tripped over that sign!"