Craft Beers Pillows

'Jim should call his home brew Lottery Ticket - there's about a 1-in-50-million chance of being happy with it.'

"I feel like we've walked into some sort of epidemic of hipatitus."

"Come to our microbrew party Saturday. It's B.Y.O.B. — Bring Your Own Brewery."

'Think I preferred the old Irish barman.'

'We have 800 beers on tap. If you want to hear all of them, you'll have to get here earlier, we close in six hours.'

"Our Summer Citrus IPA contains your full daily requirement of fruit and fiber."

"This brew is quite hoppy - they must of added too much toad."

'So, what do you think of my first attempt at making homemade beer?'

"Buy a man a six-pack, he drinks for a day. Teach him to brew, he drinks all his life."

Joined at the hipster.

"It's a new countertop draft system for craft beer!"

Beer Stall

'And if you can't find the microbrew you're looking for here, you might want to try our other store: Microbrews C to E.'

'If by 'great', you mean 'terrible', then yes, we have plenty of great beers for under $4.00 a six-pack.'

Happy thoughts

Craft Donuts vs. Craft Beer

"Try this new IPA I just finished. Let me know if the malts and hops are layered like last week's batch." "Bailey was a really 'good boy'."

"This cheap can of domestic beer has a bouquet reminiscent of...beer."

Bottle Distillery

"It's from the local micro brewery..."

"Fetch me another Sculpin IPA."

'Malty tasking.'

Micro-Brewed Brain Beer

'Make it a microbrew, Jake! I've gone organic!'

California Beverages Map

"I was wondering if you could recommend a good 'hoppy' beer?"

'Well,we had a good run.' - Worldwide Hops Shortage.

"As it happens, we don't produce any beer flavored wine."

"Tea parties are passé. I'm opening a craft brewery."

"Thousands of craft beers and I still haven't found one with a smooth, kibble finish."

'This low-alcohol beer doesn't taste bad with a scotch in it.'

Ernie is a master brewer! He's highly skilled in every phase of the beer-making process! Business is booming at our craft beer pub! Ernie, are those ladies old enough to buy beer? I didn't ask for I.D. I didn't want to violate the no "dating" the customers policy. Ernie is an absolute genius about beer, but lacks common sense about everything else! (Published originally on Nov. 8, 2015.)

Cold Beers and Skiers

Real Beer People

'I brew it myself.'