Courtroom Spectator T-Shirts

'Then if there are no objections, we will recess until tomorrow morning.'

'This is my partner. He'll be taking care of the small print.'

"Our new associate asks how much of a fee is too much. Do you want to handle this or shall I laugh in his face?"

'Look -- I'm willing to forget about all this if you are.'

"We won!"

I love Lawyers

"Now that's a win."

Sue the Author 3PM

"Bailiff."

'Normally, I hate a rush to judgement - but I'm doing this case pro bono.'

'I think I'll become a lawyer.'

'When you get up on the stand be sure to keep your answers short. A whole lot of barking will only frighten the jury.'

"I've learned something in this trial. My firm needs to hire that prosecutor."

"Now that I've swung back to depression, I'm truly sorry for what I did when I was manic."

"I object!" "Overruled!"

"Never mind what I did, Your Honor. I want to be judged for who I am, as an individual."

"Lights! Camera! Justice!"

"The prosecution shall stop referring to the defendant as 'the alleged, totally guilty as sin guy'."

"Well, heck! If all you smart cookies agree, who am I to dissent?"

"I'm sorry, sir, but I've got to ask you another question. I heard someone in the courtroom shout out the correct answer."

'We have irreconcilable differences -- he's a MAN!'

'Do you expect the jury to believe that? And, more importantly, do you expect the viewers of the eventual TV movie of this trial to believe it?'

Sue The Bastards

"Am I going to get my just desserts?"

"They're class action figures."

"In a just world we'd have 'No Lawyer Left Behind'."

The Birth of a Lawsuit

'You are both charged with quarrelling without a license!'

"I've asked you not to overrule me in front of the children."

"And finally, I implore the jury not to take my clients lack of alibi and blatant lies out of context."

"The ignorance of the lawyer is no excuse."

"Better that a hundred guilty men go free than one innocent man be convicted, right?"

'The Grand Jury doesn't understand me...'

'Let's try it again. And this time, don't cross your fingers.'

'I object, Your Honor! Hearsay evidence!'