Couples Navigating Breakups Mugs

"Our relationship is much like your old computer. It's crashed."

"I met him on an online dating site. He was on their 'return' section."

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'When he said it would be 'me and him against the world' I had no idea everyone was already mad at him.'

"I always spend New Year's surrounded by loved ones."

"Only time can heal a broken heart, Brenda, and fortunately I have the time, every Thursday at three o'clock."

A man sews broken hearts back together.

"Don't wait too long for Mr. Right or you'll end up with Mr. What's left!"

"I'm sorry, Brad, but I'm saving eye-contact for that special someone."

'I don't believe in blind dates... the last time I got fixed up I got neutered.'

'Yeah, but this time she just said no -- there wasn't any hysterical laughter!'

"You've got to learn to let go."

'Well, if you really want to know...you will meet a short, pale and ugly man...'

"In this YouTube tutorial, I'm going to show you how to be alone with yourself."

"I'm not sure I'm ready to date again. I'm just coming off a bad mitosis."

A woman buries her broken heart

'I couldn't run away with you. I feel I would be depriving a village of its idiot!'

'Right now I'm on a 'man diet'. No more boyfriends until I lose twenty pounds.'

"You came back!"

"Then one day he said, 'It's either me or the damned cat!'"

"Of course we'll still be friends...."

"I feel like Brunnhilde, but in 'The Kentucky Cycle.'"

"Oh, god. . . not another night at home watching Ingmar Bergman films!"

"I'm a dish, not a bowl. This was never going to work."

Ducttape Man! I'll mend your broken heart!

"You lying fink! Your dating profile specifically stated you were a non smoker!!"

"Don't ever give up, Marjorie. I never thought I'd meet anyone either."

'It's over'