Couples Dynamics T-Shirts

'Oh, for goodness sake! Can't you see he's just trying to bait you?'

It would be hours before Jack realized that his wife was not being kinky but had, in fact, gone shopping.

"Bad weather is expected."

"Evidence suggests she was working on the puzzle, got up to make tea, husband enters and puts last piece in..."

"Remember that time you tried to kill me?"

"Will you stand by him through humiliating revelation after humiliating revelation, and then-once you're sure it couldn't possibly get any worse-when even more humiliating revelations come to light?"

Mixed Doubles.

"The TV remote? So, I decide what we watch tonight?"

I really think I can handle this date on my own. Lemme ask you something. Would you trust me alone with a ybot 340? An Xbox 360? They changed the name? Okay. But you cannot hit on my date. I'm only here to help.

"She just takes things too seriously in our relationship."

"My husband is taking me on a cruise, so I’m looking for a book that will help me forget that I’m on a cruise with my husband."

Family with pets.

Home Business - Electric Stapler.

'Men order. . . women shop.'

'Mongrel' 'Bitch's' - His and Hers towels for Dogs.

Awkward First Dates

"Hey. Whatever happened to our sexual relations? "

"And remember, woman... I'm the one who wears the sassy pastel yellow toreador pants in the family!"

"What's so wrong with always living in the present?"

"My wife has always encouraged me... ...to quit this stupid dream and get a real job." ... "You have a wife?"

Early man wasn't exactly enthusiastic about the development of language.

'..and if you must yawn tonight keep your mouth shut.'

"We cancelled Netfix for this?"

'On second thought dear, I think it's your turn to make breakfast.'

"Be careful, Darlene. He's wearing a ring."

"Who says you can't teach an old dog new tricks?"

'We just don't talk anymore, Gerald!'

"If she's a write off can you let me know the scrap value?"

"We used to entertain a great deal."

'Oh, we don't keep score in our marriage, Dr. Downs, but if we did, I'd be winning 212 to 137.'

'It's nice to go hiking together. It gives us a chance to compare notes and figure out what the kids are plotting!'

"I thought we agreed that the dining room was a buffer zone."

"Did you honestly expect our couples therapist to know when Jacoby Ellsbury will be off the disabled list?!"

"Steak, Richard, is just grown up veal."

'Dad, this is something I knocked up in the shed.'