Couple Goals Seeker Gifts

Herbert can't read, Janice can't jump, but together they can rule the world!

'Turn on slow romantic music and try taking off your shell in a more seductive way...'

'The Triumph of Cupid'

Jigsaw love

"Yes, I'm from London. 'Which part?' you ask. Well all of me!"

"...and someone with no fleas. Anything else?"

Cling-On Dog

"O.K. I'm just feeding in your personal details for a suitable match..."

"I can't wait to introduce you to all the people I used to be friends with, before I started spending all my time with you."

"I've been out of the dating scene a long time. Is kissing still a thing?"

"Have you tried carbon dating?"

"Well, I finally figured out why we were going to the vet so often for check ups! He finally plucked up the courage to ask her out!"

"Yeah, my life flashed before my eyes!...OK, it was food - all the food I've ever eaten flashed before my eyes."

Speed Dating.

"When the world gives you mean and macho, reach for licks and love."

"You won’t find a more effective antidepressant."

'Jane, cancel all my appointments for the rest of the week.'

I'm your girlfriend and best friend so I get twice as many slices

"My wife has always encouraged me... ...to quit this stupid dream and get a real job." ... "You have a wife?"

"When it comes to loving someone, I never seem to get it right."

"Do you have a boyfriend?"

The Wishing Well

'Telephone call for Mr. Right!'

Horny Nanny Seeks Lonely Goat Herd.

"Try a danged head shot!"

'I've just realised where we went wrong.'

"Romeo,Romeo. Are you online,Romeo"

'Speed dating really works! Our first date was Friday, we married on Saturday, and now I'm happily single again.'

"I don't want to be alone when I'm old, either, so when we're old let's get back in touch."

'No, there isn't a probationary period!'

"I'm the lot of baggage he comes with."

A man surrounded with lovehearts

The men of your dreams

"My wife - is she still staring at me?"

"Sorry, pal. I just need to make sure she likes me for me."