Country Jokester Prints

"I'm on the range, but I'm not home on the range."

"If you ask me, wearing these things only makes them nervous."

I'm prepared to admit that you may have startled me a bit, sure!

'Whup - giant anaconda about to attack - quick Peg, hand me something to take care of it with.'

"Do you think there's intellegent life in there?"

I fart more than that!

"Do you think the birds like me?"

'Well, I got a hunting license and a fishing license and by golly I'm going to use them.'

"Sorry I'm late! The driving conditions are awful!"

'Zeb, don't you reckon it's time you took that pig into town and traded him for some decent Wi'-Fi?'

"Must get a longer cable."

Dr B orge tests his new cow-fart ozone depletion meter.

Clandestine cows.

Squirrel chopping wooden leg of lumberjack.

"My husband is fishing. . ."

Bird feeder being used by vultures.

When Farmer Harry Met Farmer Sally.

"Perhaps it would be easier using mice?"

'I guess everything's okay, doc, two legs is showing, one out of each hole."

I've been doing sit-ups!

A centi-stampede.

COWS: Spare cow

"Daisy had twin bull calves. How'd you do?"

'Is it my imagination, or has this suddenly become harder to push?'

'I'm afraid to a horse a carrot is just a carrot!'

A cow's bedside table.

'Serves me right for frowning.'

A chicken coop with a loudspeaker on the roof

Farmer with gun shots instead of flying ducks

'He's not here.He's out on a sting operation.'

The wife made it. Why?

That's one harmonious butt hole!

Look, I'm not shocked. It's just that you sounded a bit different on the phone!