Counterfeit Expert Pillows

'We don't have to go on any quiz show. We're millionaires!'

'Who was the murderer? Well Watson, that's the killer question.'

'I'm afraid this new self you reinvented has already been patented.'

"Yours is the worst case of identity theft I've investigated."

'I'm going to ask you one more time; who left a hot mug on this table?'

'How can we be so sure it's a fake, gentlemen - she isn't smiling!'

US Camouflage School

'Great news Marcel! Proof that it's a genuine Leonardo!'

'Well, I don't know anything about 'identity theft'. All I can tell you, is that according to these records you're already here.'

'I suspect, Madam, that this Van Gogh is a forgery.'

"No. I can still see you."

"All right, which one stole your identity?"

"When this is all over I'll be nice to people."

"My client already has a patent on round things."

'Oh, no! They've got a Swiss-army defence lawyer!'

'Your resume is great - but I'm always suspicious when a good man is easy to find.'

"I miss infringing U.S. copyright law."

"Remember – anything said on this butte stays on this butte."

'How could you swindle those good people who trusted you?'

Introvert Career Faire.

'Well it didn't get up and walk away by itself.'

Forged signed memorabilia.

An employee of a school for spies, reads a top secret document as the photo/ painting of the schools founder peeks over his shoulder.

'Due to intellectual property concerns, I refuse to answer any questions.'

"I experienced a rare moment of inner peace and solitary introspection, so of course I had to post a selfie."

The Smoking Gun

'What do you mean you keep getting 'The number you want is busy' ?'

CIA, 'Confound it, Ruggles - we're SUPPOSED to be worrywarts!'

You Think Your Phone Is Spying on You.

"I didn't know there was that much money in the whole world!"

"Stop having good ideas for other people."

'It's too late to copyright 'Have a nice day.''

Reality of the Antique Roadshow: 'I bought it at a garage sale for $10.' 'Ha! You really got ripped off!'