Couch Potato Comedy Lover Gifts

The "staring back at you" channel

"I can't believe you watched all three bowl games!"

'The following program is intended for beer bellied, sports crazed, couch potatoes!'

"It's an update from the people tracking us. According to this, we haven't gone anywhere or done anything."

"Honey, do these sweatpants make me look like I prefer we stay in tonight so I can watch the game?"

"I swapped my 'couch to 5k' training app for a '5k to couch' one!"

'I met him on a Monday and my heart stood still (would you believe?)')

'Have you seen me?' (Brain missing in TV viewer)

Unconditional Loveseat

'Just sitting around letting advertisers brainwash me. What about you?'

Homo Zapiens

'Where does the teacher get this? Wilbur shows no motivation in class!'

Ask not what your country can do for you, ask what is good on Netflix.

Couch Potatoes

'I'm not lazy - just resting before I get tired...'

"This lockdown is GREAT! - We can spend all day on our computers, eating takeaway junk food and watching crap TV while gambling on our iphones!"

"I'm SO lazy, I married a pregnant woman. . . !"

'Well, the marriage guidance counsellor advised us to share each others interests, didn't she?'

"Let's wait for it to come out on cable and then not watch it."

Oh, the usual. They're watching 'American Idol' and I'm watching Americans idle.

'My husband likes to have everything handy during TV commercials.'

"Will I still be able to not exercise?"

"Let's see what's going on in the world."

"Hang on, I'll get him for you."

'The Cup Final's just starting-think I should wake him?'

Pets are not only good companions, they're good excuses.

"Alexa, tell me ways I can be less of a lazy slob who won't get up to turn off the lights."

"Well, sometimes we take the dogs for a walk...which puts our fitness level at approximately that of an 80-year-old couple."

"He's fine, Ma'm."

"I hardly think you can call waiting for updates to install doing nothing!!"

The inevitability of animal husbandry.

"The doctor wants me to exercise more, so I need you to lift my feet even more when you're not vacuuming."

"You know, dear, planting your base in a chair and eating chicken is not 'plant-based' eating."

"All the atmosphere of 'Murray Mound' but in the comfort of your own home!"

'Remember, your father may be here physically, but mentally he's attending the NCAA tournament.'