Couch Potato Champions T-Shirts

'Maybe if you showed some sign of life once in a while this sort of thing wouldn't happen.'

Oh, those are just my husband's buddies - Whatshisname, Whatshisface, and Whatshisproblem.

'Well you were warned about the dangers of sedentary lifestyle.'

'Our lifestyle is watching lifestyle TV.'

"I'm watching the hockey game. The score is 4 nothing for the Zamboni driver."

"I swapped my 'couch to 5K' training app for a '5K to couch' one!"

'The following program is intended for beer bellied, sports crazed, couch potatoes!'

"It's an update from the people tracking us. According to this, we haven't gone anywhere or done anything."

"Honey, do these sweatpants make me look like I prefer we stay in tonight so I can watch the game?"

University Soapflakes

American Idle.

"Well, at least it's an improvement from last night."

"Doesn't seem like 6 hours on the couch, but you can't argue with a lethargy tracker."

"I swapped my 'couch to 5k' training app for a '5k to couch' one!"

"We'd better stock up on TV snacks in the event of war."

'Have you seen me?' (Brain missing in TV viewer)

'He usually doesn't follow medical advice, but when the doctor told him to learn to relax...'

"Your blood sugar levels are off the chart! Just how many Hallmark Christmas movies did you watch?"

"You'll love this model, sir! You won't have to miss any of the sports action when you go for a beer!"

'Just look at him. The face that lunched on a thousand chips.'

Unconditional Loveseat

Homo Zapiens

'Where does the teacher get this? Wilbur shows no motivation in class!'

'Now that's Real TV!'

"It's tough to get him moving, but once he's going he never stops."

Starvation Watching

'She's not very good. She only did three revolutions and her air wasn't all that much.'

'Well, the marriage guidance counsellor advised us to share each others interests, didn't she?'

'Whatever, crosswords are stupid.'

'My arms are getting shorter.'

'My husband likes to have everything handy during TV commercials.'

"Another CSI spinoff? What's this one called?"

... And by the end of the first quarter of the game, the famous 'Man Cave' was completely deserted.

"That's Reubens, he's an alternate lifestyle coach."

"I'm SO lazy, I married a pregnant woman. . . !"