Couch Collectors T-Shirts

"We've decided to give you a bonus, Rick. It's any change you find under the cushions."

'...when did you first get these feelings of wanting to be a psychiatrist?'

"This new chair has the smoothest 360 swivel action on the market!"

"I now pronounce you man and couch."

"If it's got my ass on it, it's befitting of royalty."

'I'm tired of roaming the earth. Can we just stay home tonight?'

"My pillow mania got out of control so I'm limiting myself to just one at a time."

"At our age I'd say we have about two or three binge watches left in us."

For sale sign: 'Unique 16th Century cottage. Similar properties wanted.'

'Ask your doctor if getting your fat butt off the couch might be right for you!'

'Less spare change under the cushion is my leading economic indicator!'

"This one seems perfect, but do you have it in red?"

Cinzia Baffi's Time-And-Temp Chair

The Milbrook Verney chair in literature. The C.K. Frebish endowment for footnotes.

Eventual Motion Machine

"I've only just started practicing. I'm hoping the proceeds from these first few sessions will pay for a couch."

"He's so ostentatious about how un-ostentatious he is."

"Well, if I was ambitious, we'd have a nice house and more money, but I'd never be around."

"You need the exercise, so I bought you a bigger remote."

"Why did we buy such huge furniture?"

"How much for the couch without the potato?"

'Hope you like the oversized furniture. It helps me feel young.'

"I know that in these bad times nobody is hiring and workers are still being laid off, but what will be your excuse when the economy recovers?"

John bought himself a new "Unfit" bracelet.

'Darling! This isn't a property programme at all! It's the view from our living room window..'

Recliner Throne: For Work and Relaxation

"Sorry, dear, but vowing NOT to climb Mount Everest this year isn't a valid New Year's resolution."

American Idle

False alarm; chair salesman

'Plus, you get to keep any change you happen to find under the cushions.'