Cost Management Connoisseur T-Shirts

Pay Hospital Bill Here

'We should buy London and ship it to the States!'

Squirrel putting nuts in a safe box.

'You have to reconcile your gross habits with your net income.'

'What's the smallest budget you can manage on?' 'The most you can give me!'

'I'd like to explain my ideas for economy within the company.'

'According to the budget, we'll have to count on body heat to keep the offices warm.'

The Complete Spaghetti Dinner.

'And this is my strategic money reserve.'

'Excuse me, sir. Could you spare $2000,000 to treat an uninsurable pre-existing condition?'

"I hate check writing, but, hey, it pays the bills."

'This could be a very expensive operation — I'm going to refer you to the Federal Government.'

The ways and means committee reaches the tipping point.

Rare Medical Conditions - The compulsive desire to work out restaurant bills correctly

'In a cost-saving move, I've replaced your cubicle with a back pack.'

"Yow! Thank goodness you've kept costs on a short leash!"

'If I'm going to do an effective job of reducing costs, I'm going to need a bigger budget.'

'My pay envelope is empty.' - 'Your deductions equal your salary'

'I want to return this wallet. I can't seem to keep any money in it.'

"Post-holiday dieting will be much easier this year. Our disposable cash flow will be diverted."

"We re cutting back on overhead."

"It's our latest targets...We have to do twice as much with half the stuff in a quarter of the time!"

'No - we really don't cater for vegans, even our salad dressing is made from sperm oil!'

US Deficit

"Most of my consumerism is self-taught."

"Strategic plan B: We chop down all the office plants and grow vegetables."

'And finally, there's option three, a classic business model that would reduce our marketing, supply-chain and production expenses by 85 percent!' '

"We can probably just about afford to run the pilot-light."

'Investors Chronicle' "How do I know whether to buy it or not?"

Bureau of Spending Decreases and Deficit Reduction - 'Wait a minute! How can that be?'

'Well, you're bankrupt, but look on the bright side -- it only cost you eight dollars per transaction!'

'I think we should budget on the number of budgets we draw up'

Doctor to man: 'You'll need to empty your pockets. For symbolic purposes, let's start with your wallet.'

'I've just thought of a way to save the company £1800 a month.'

How to do without