Cosmic Job Seeker T-Shirts

"Have you travelled far?"

The Adventures of God

'I'm going to Venus. He's going to Mars.'

"You called me, boss?" "Yes, I overheard you talking to patrons about all the new planets we’ve found." "I want you to stop doing that." "At least until I’m done buying up as much of that real estate as I can. I don’t need any competitors driving up the prices." "Very bad man." "When the hipsters run out of cities to gentrify here, my properties on Gliese 581c are going to make a killing."

Alien uses astronaut's visor as TV to watch news.

'Alright, throw in your resume and the 'Get A Job' potion will be complete.'

Cosmology marches on. . .

"Earthlings."

I send greetings from the planet OOM!

"I'll see if we have some Ginger Ale."

"Why should I feel small? I've just been put in charge of the whole Eastern region."

'You know, I was buying this resume until I got to the part about you serving on your town's Ouija Board.'

Aliens leaving spacecraft.

"I've been entangled with a photon on the other side of the galaxy for eons, and then yesterday, out of the blue, she said she wants to date OTHER particles!"

'Bill, we've decided to increase your sales territory.'

'I want to tap into my higher self.'

'We don't settle for second best... And Bleargh here is the best in the galaxy.'

Space Orchestra

"No air guitar"

Mooning Moon

"I'm not sure if this proves there was intelligent life on this planet or not."

'Well, this just seems indulgent.'

Sign on the Pearly Gates reads: 'Now hiring.' Man says, 'We're in luck!'

Leon's Auto Salvage and Center for Interpretive Dance

Last night I met an interesting guy online. He's an Aries with a trust fund rising.

Crop Circle Haircut.

Alien Prank

Astronaut 'mooning' at his colleague