Corporate Shenanigans Observer T-Shirts

'Okay, you can start sending in the applicants, beginning with the lowest 'salary expectation'.'

"The good news is you’re the only one we’re not firing ... the bad news is you’re the only one to run the department."

"Yes Sir, I'm still working on the 'ins and outs' of their proposal."

Areas of the Body Where Stress Can Manifest

'Pssst! Straighten up, here come the bigwigs.'

'We're just like family. Stop mumbling, Cindy. Straighten up, Fred. Get that hair out of your eyes, Janet...'

"We've decided your suggestion to have a day care center here at work has merit."

"Koalas when no one's looking"

"We'd better watch Cranston. He looks like a whistleblower."

"Mum, I got the job!"

"Maybe our beloved founder is trying to tell us something."

'Comments? Thoughts? Anyone?'

"I'll put your application on file, Mr. Brandt, but I'm quite happy with my current paperweight."

"Well, I've emailed, faxed, and phoned Dobson. Maybe I should just walk down the hall and talk to him..."

'I like people.. but not a whole lot.'

"...in other news: Google has been admitted to the United Stations..."

"They grow up so fast."

"I'm afraid that following the audit, Mr. Davis is no longer with us... On the bright side, the corner office is now available!"

'Another nice thing about working here, they tend to promote from within.'

'It may well be nesting J.T but damn it, you've got a company to turn.'

"We are extremely short-staffed here and you would need to be okay with that. For example I’m the janitor, but I also do interviews in between emptying trash cans."

Call Your Office

'It's either the worst idea to attract new clients I've ever seen, or the best...'

'Mr. Donovan, is it all right if I tie my shoelace?'

"They pay well but they expect a lot from you."

Multitasking executive dog

'We're looking for people who like to take work home.'

'See Dick sleep on job. See Dick get fired.'

Very fat 'Office' facing more waiters with trays of demand

"With great power comes great, great stress."

"When you reach the bottom of the pile, you'll find this week's paycheck."

"I'm concerned, Larry. All you seem to do lately is put out fires and run around like a..."

'In five year's time?... I see myself on that side of the desk telling you it's a great shame, thanks for all your hard work, but I'm going to have to let you go!'

Board of directors of a baby products company suck their thumbs after realising sales and profits are down.

'There's a Mr Tilbin here to see you sir. Shall I tell him you're on the phone, in a meeting, or out of the office?'