Office Shenanigans Aficionado T-Shirts

"We don't need to talk! I need to YELL!!!!!"

"Another week another dollar, Jenkins"

"Peter's Joint Head of Communications."

"And where have you previously moused?"

'We're just like family. Stop mumbling, Cindy. Straighten up, Fred. Get that hair out of your eyes, Janet...'

"The article you sent me on how technology causes stress crashed my computer."

"Of course you can resign Ferguson. How would you like to buy back your freedom? Cash, credit card or easy payments?"

'Recent studies in primate colonies suggest that organizational performance can be improved by replacing complicated financial incentives with bananas.'

"...But of course we'll still be friends on Facebook!"

"Here's some of my work for you to do. It should be a refreshing change...for me."

"You're hired. Now, I'll show you your desk, the break room, and the dented wall you're allowed to beat your head against."

"Here's to non-electric sharpeners."

"I can't decide who gets the promotion, so we'll settle it with a rope toy Tug O' War."

"On a positive note, he's not our boss. He's the guy who stole our boss's identity."

'Face it, we're never going to reach a consensus.'

'In the computer simulation he said he admired my candor and gave me a raise.'

Should not have put that suggestion in the suggestion box.'

"I was going to tell you it's a jungle out there, but I realize that's probably old news to you."

...The computer says you can handle 20 more work

"Why, if it isn't Henshaw caught in the Overtime Warp again."

'Remember, my door is always open Higgins, just be careful of the trap door.'

'It's not fair. Women doing the same job I'm doing in this office are being paid more than I am!'

'We're very proud of you, Jenkins. Keep up the good work.'

Batsford doesn't suffer fools gladly.

"Maybe our beloved founder is trying to tell us something."

"What's your occupation?"

"Confounded spell checker... never catches anything."

'She finally made employee of the month but she paid the ultimate price.'

'Remember you told me to be friendly to your boss.'

'I've collected my memos into one reasonably priced gift book.'

"It's a shame, excellent recommendations and a superb skill set but lacks the boiling hot all consuming ambition and ruthless desire for self promotion required as head of stationary procurement."

'Hawaii can wait. These reports cannot.'

'I owe you an apology, Greffman -- Let's keep it that way.'

We have a nice selection of office artifacts, a typewriter, carbon paper, ashtrays, our CEO's last handwritten memo...

"Next on the agenda: How can we crush workers' spirit, while appearing to care?"