Corporate Diplomat Pillows

Conflict resolution in the workplace.

"I suppose I'll be the one to mention the elephant in the room."

'In the future, if you want to get my attention, I'd appreciate it if you didn't yell out - Yo, Big Cheese!'

'Mr Cummings will now discuss that gray area between legal acts and illegal acts.'

"I think I've found a solution to our communication problems."

Employee Questions.

'Surely you wouldn't want me to laugh at your joke if I didn't think it was funny!'

"Can I savor this for a few moments? The ball's never been in my court before!"

"They decided giving out pink slips was too impersonal. So now they're blue."

"Be patient. He'll have to visit the water cooler sooner or later."

"Then we have an unspoken agreement?"

"Well, it looks like the merger is off."

"I need to see your budget proposal."

"We can waste time and look for a solution or...just find a scapegoat?"

Inclusive speech

'Hey, look, I can stand up and shout, too!'

"I just want you to know that promotion, this office, and those Luna bars were mine!"

'You really want that promotion, don't you, Sherman?'

'The toughest things you have to deal with in this job, is feelings and lawyers.'

"That's the last time I'm going to allow politics to be discussed in the office."

'I am willing to concede that the company has been underperforming of late...'

Tug of Negotiation and Conciliation.

"Lost my job. But I'm pretty sure it's around here somewhere."

"You are being overly-defensive again, Brenda!"

'I went into that meeting with a hidden agenda and then forgot where I put it.'

"A one-word email reply... classic power move."

"It looks like the 'because I say so' has it."

'Here's another one that'll make you blow your stack.'

Career Choices

'To close the deal, I had to make some minor concessions.'

'Would you be interested in attending a stress management seminar?'

'Congratulations Smith, you got that promotion. Commiserations Reid, you got that demotion.'

"I was going to have my people call his people, but I’m pretty sure his people have Caller I.D."

"If I can't get a firm decision, I'd accept a wobbly acquiescence."

Office meeting