Corporate Culture Aficionado Gifts

"Before we begin this family meeting, how about we go around and say our names and a little something about ourselves."

'Ok, here's the meeting agenda ... it's gonna be a long one.'

'Someday this will all be done by consultants.'

I don't know what it is but I just think the chap in the middle would fit into the firm REALLY well.

"When I agreed to the merger Thompson, I never expected THIS!"

'Sometimes I feel the company would collapse if we weren't here.'

"We've always had an open door AND an open window policy."

'As part of our initiative to promote positivity at work, this is the proposed new mission statement.'

'Most of my clients are shareholders, managers and sales executives.'

"You're a shark! You're a killer! Nothing can stop you! Now get back in that boardroom and apologize."

Traffic Lights Read 'Buy/Sell'.

'You don't agree with me? No problem. You're not the first one, if you understand what I mean...'

"Wait -- I have an app that creates a napkin to write the contract terms on."

'You're all voting against me? Is this a coo?'

Schmoozing 101

'I'll have what's left of my people get in touch with what's left of your people to set up a meeting on a merger.'

Man at work surrounded by office desks

"That's when we put those expensive organic snacks in the vending machines."

"Here comes a client I must speak to. Excuse me while I slip into some jargon."

'I love my personal assistant.'

'He's tough - he's not giving an inch.'

'You're about to see some really tight security here.'

'What does everyone else think of the proposal?'

Financial Corp. Inc.

"...abandoned as a cub, brought up by a couple of stockbrokers in Surbiton."

'Get those joints rolled, Ms. Hensley, there's a mob on the way!'

"We need workers who like to take responsibility and who want to make their own decisions. That's why we've got a drink machine where you can select tea or coffee."

"If it weren't for the team of MBA's that have been here fro the start of the company we would never make it through the bankruptcy and restructuring."

"This is our corporate motto. I want each of you to hang a copy in your office...they're 20 euros each!"

"There's no reason to belabor the point, but don't think that's gonna stop me."

"I propose we hire some new management consultants to reverse-engineer the previous consultants' re-engineering plan."

"Hmm... Perkins seems to be understanding this gibberish. I'd better act like I do, too."

"Drop in anytime. My door is always open."

"I'm not called the Grim Reaper now - I'm an 'After-life Care Facilitator. . .'"

"He's not a big fan of micromanaging."