Corporate Communication Analyst T-Shirts

"It's not downsizing—it's just that we have 976 employees who have chosen to spend more time with their families."

"Why won't you teach us how to handle complaints?"

"Then we have an unspoken agreement?"

"You know, there are other emojis."

"Brilliant report, I can't tell where the facts and the fiction begins"

'It appears the 'What?'s have it.'

'I've given a lot of thought to giving some thought to your latest proposal.'

"Look at them smiling. They've reached their comfort zone."

"A one-word email reply... classic power move."

"We'd better watch Cranston. He looks like a whistleblower."

He used to pass the buck, since being promoted to management he gets to call it delegating authority.

HR - Helping Relationships

"Here comes a client I must speak to. Excuse me while I slip into some jargon."

"I was going to have my people call his people, but I’m pretty sure his people have Caller I.D."

"Repeat after me: We are delivering the proactive core value promises and rolling out our real time best practice action plan going forward ..."

'Could we finish these negotiations via e-mail? That will allow me to think before I respond to your proposals.'

"Now this chart should clear up any confusion you have with the report."

"...our Annual Report has been criticised for lack of clarity - well done!"

"My resume is concise, succinct and eloquently worded. I only hope they know what I'm talking about."

'This merger will cut jobs 40%, reduce salaries 30% and increase the work hours 25%. Your job is to make this look like the best thing that ever happened to our employees.'

'We used to be a patriarchy, but lately we've been more goddess-centric.'

"Using worst case scenario as a baseline, I consider this data quite encouraging."

'Boss, it seems like a friendly text, but you've got to learn to read between the emoticons.'

'Who wants the talking stick?'

'We just don't talk anymore, Gerald!'

'What's the concept? I'm not sure what you're trying to say, Ms. Harris.'

'The Human Right Act bans ANY cruel or unusual treatment...we may need to rewrite our ENTIRE customer care policy!'

"What other skills do you obtain other than being able to answer interview questions?"

"I meant the dog!"

"We're to stop talking about 'budget cuts'. Apparently it's depressing for staff and clients..."

'I can beat my own drum but it'll be counting on your to toot my horn.'

Giving feedback is a complex process.

"Despite years of management training john still found it difficult to give negative feedback."

'Your proposal sounds interesting. Can you send me a written proposal? I cannot reread a phone call.'

Bob tried networking – and crashed it.