Copy Shop Employees Pillows

'I'm sorry; what we're really looking for is someone who won't make a difference.'

"I don't care if you are the Immediate Gratification Generation. Get out of my chair and back to the mailroom."

Like, Latte. So that's a vanilla almond with soy, extra foam, whipped cream, nutmeg, and caramel. Leave room for coffee?

Charles Darwin Book Signing.

National Coffee Day

How About Serving Us For a Change

'I'm a purist. I don't take anything in my Vanilla Mocha Dulce Latte.'

'Cold hard facts are good, but to complete the picture, here's Brenda from the mailroom with some hot, juicy gossip.'

Auto Mechanic Birthdays

"This is to apologise for the delay in internal mail that you wrote to us about in 1997"

"I know nobody here works with each other, but it seems like morale is down."

"Hold on, I'll make that coffee to go!"

'The good news is I'm down to one latte a day.'

"Social distancing... masks, it's difficult sometimes to know who you're talking to."

"You've got to compress it because my email account is limited to 3MB."

"You got the chip shop gig, then?"

"Don't be a follower. Be your own man."

'I just never thought you would turn into such a clock watcher.'

Republicans have me feeling reflective about capitalism, in a good way. Uh, oh. You've been with the company 20 years. I appreciate that kind of loyalty. I just want you to know that. Thanks. It also makes me realize that you have few other job options and thus are more or less subject to my whims regarding pay and benefits. Okay, pep talk over. Enjoy your day. Hang on, I could maybe possibly get a job at Coffee King!

"Can you make me a tall Tazo chai latte with soy milk?" Bartleby, the soon-to-be-unemployed barista.

Printing Room

'This is the mail room, they're a little short of staff sometimes.'

Abuse or harassment of staff will not be tolerated

"How mushy do you like your peas..?"

"The good news is that the CEO said he had never seen such a committed and competent group of workers. The sad news is that he was talking about the staff at the coffee shop next door."

"Iced grande soy triple-lutz latte!"

'Since Ed's creativity is 10% inspiration and 90% perspiration, we request that he submit only photocopies.'

Nasa Incoming Mail.

"I've been working in the mail room for over 6 months. I was hoping to be at least a CEO by now."

'I'm retiring tomorrow. . . do you have any 'So Long, Suckers' cards?'

"Sending letters instead of emails keeps the balls out of my court longer."

"I'm sorry. When I told everybody that we started in the mailroom together, I didn't realize you were still there."

'We'll be relying on three sources of raw data ? direct mail, phone survey, and Eddie in the mail room.'

Will pull fire alarm so you can ditch your online date.

When the trendy bottoms out.